The Pursuit Begins

I'm reading a book by A.W. Tozer called, "The Pursuit of God." It's not a beach read, if you know what I mean. I've read just the preface three times. Usually I dislike books like that- that I have to re-read simply to understand what it's about. But for some reason, this one is different. Perhaps because it seems to be speaking so loudly to me about what our church seems to be going through.

In the very first chapter, Tozer says, "We must simplify our approach to (God). We must strip down to the essentials (and they will be found to be blessedly few). We must put away all effort to impress, and come with the guileless candor of childhood. If we do this, without doubt, God will quickly respond." (Italics mine).

I need a response from God, so I began to wonder what the blessedly few essentials were. One I'm quite sure of: worship.

Worship is something our church has done away with. They still sing some songs before the preacher preaches, but true worship has been tossed. I know that people at my church might heatedly disagree with me, but it's true, none-the-less. Worship, communing with God, telling Him of your love for him while tears stream down your face, celebrating his goodness, his faithfulness, his power, his perfection: it just doesn't happen. I believe we could do nothing at all but worship him and he would still be pleased.

Tozer goes on to say that "there is little that we need other than God Himself. The evil habit of seeking God-and effectively prevents us from finding God in full revelation. In the and lies our great woe. If we omit the and we shall soon find God, and in Him we shall find that for which we have all our lives been secretly longing."

At our church, we seek God-and-experiencing life (or perhaps it is better said, "God-and-L.I.F.E.") L.I.F.E is our program for experiencing life in Christ. It has its four indicators to make sure you're doing it right. If you've Got Christ (said like, "Got Milk?") then you Live for others, Invite others to L.I.F.E. in Christ, Follow the teachings of God, and Exalt God above all else. That's how you'll know you've got it right.

But that's not what Tozer says. He says that if you've got it right, it will be manifest as an increased yearning for God- a hot pursuit- an unquenchable thirst for Him and Him alone. But you don't have to take my word, or even Tozer's word for it. Jesus said it this way, "And this is the real and eternal life. That they know you, the one and only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you sent." (John 17:3)

My church appears to pursue image, larger buildings, more members, and a greater profile in this community rather than God. Now, they vehemently deny that's what they're about. They repeat over and over that "numbers" simply means "lives" and as the numbers increase, that means that lives are touched. They say that bigger and more beautiful facilities will draw people so they can then teach them about God. The better and bigger facilities will make it easier to teach people about God. They color it with words that sound right, but even Satan got most of the words right when he messed with Eve in Eden. Expanding programs, and numbers, and buildings seems a roundabout way to reach God. I find I want less and less of what they have to offer. I find my peace in siding with the tribe of Levi, who, when God divided the land of Canaan among his children, Levi received none. "I AM thy part and thine inheritance," He told them.

Messy Rooms, Mean Rules, and Fiddler Crabs

At my house,we have a fairly unpopular rule. The rule states, "No vacation or long break from school may start until your room is clean." When we instituted this rule, there was a great gnashing of teeth and wailing but even my messiest child (I will not divulge which this might be, for fear of retaliation) cleaned her room in record time. Right down to the Barbie (TM) shoes under her bed! It's a severe rule, I know. But sometimes drastic measures are required for drastic situations.

This last time, however, there really was very little discussion amongst the troops about it. I believe I mentioned it once or twice and, lo and behold, rooms were clean. Vacuumed and everything. How refreshing to see them not buck and fight "the system"- to accept what structure I had set up for them. And how pleasant to not be thought of as a horrible monster by the children I love. And this morning's installment of Oswald caused me to stop and ponder my own behavior regarding such situations.

If you believe in Jesus, you are not to spend all your time in the smooth waters just inside the harbour bar, full of delight, but always moored; you have to get out through the harbour bar into the great deeps of God and begin to know for yourself, begin to have spiritual discernment.

He referenced Romans 12: 1-2 (and I always take a little extra time on a verse when it starts with the words, "So here's what I want you to do..."). Take my everyday life, embrace it, place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God has done for me is the best thing I can do for Him (paraphrase).

It seems lately that I've been waiting for God to do some sort of miracle around me so I can embrace it. Fix what's going on at my church, at my job, with my health. Then, maybe, I could embrace it, work at being a better member, a better employee, a better wife, mother, friend. (Maybe HE could clean my room!) But that's not what this verse says. It says these are the conditions he's set up for me. Here are the ways I should live my everyday, laundry-toting-spaghetti-cooking- shift-working-imperfect-friend-and-family-life. And if I embrace it whole heartedly, I will no longer see God as someone who doesn't understand me or my needs, but as someone with huge, deep insights into my soul, who knows better than I what would make me happy.

Will bought two fiddler crabs yesterday. We read a little bit and discovered that they prefer "brackish" water over fresh, clean water. They live in the tidal pools, and swampy places near the shore."Nasty," was the first word that floated through my head. The girl at the pet store confirmed my thoughts when she said that the fiddler crabs were the dirtiest critters she had to care for. They could make the water in their tank black within the week. I wouldn't want to live in their environment. And it's not where God wants me to live either. Why stay close to the shore where the tide can't come clean my life? Why stayed moored to shallowness and staleness? Why continue thinking of God as someone who doesn't honestly know what's best for me?


So, yes, I may have to pull up anchor and do a bit of work and I may definitely need a serious attitude change. But somehow, it's easier trusting that this is really what's best for me. And if I roll up my sleeves and actively embrace what He has provided me, I'll get to sail out to deeper waters where I can enjoy Him even more.

Now, if I could only get them to keep their rooms this way...